God does

This whole semester has been really interesting for me. It is the first time in my life that I haven't been dealing with something major. My life has been great this semester. And so God asked: will you follow me when it seems like you don't need me? Yes. Yes. This semester I haven't heard God's voice as much as usual, but that's okay. Over the past two weeks, things have changed drastically. God has been revealing so many visions to me, it's crazy. He has given me visions to pray over other people and visions for my own life. God is moving. Yesterday was a huge day. God did so much. Last week, Student Impact was challenged to raise $5,000 to purchase a water truck for a church in the DR. The money was collected yesterday. The students donated nearly $12,500. Also, someone at our church felt compelled to match whatever the students gave. The total came to $25,000. Amazing. High schoolers. Wow. After church we went to the food pantry as a house group and packed 1,200 bags of food for families in need and cleaned the greeting room. Then my small group and I packed seeds for families in zimbabwe. Overall, as a church, we packed 500,000 family packs. That 500,000 families that will now be able to grow food for themselves. That is 500,000 families that can eat. Yesterday was also the day that God revealed a vision to me for my purpose the rest of college. I am to found an organization to raise enough money to buy a plot of land and build an orphanage for the kids I lived with in Uganda last summer. It's crazy and so much work, but God is bigger. God will inspire and God will provide. This will happen. God does.

I will confess...

I have a confession. Sometimes, I’m afraid. I am afraid to pray boldly because I am afraid that God won’t answer. I am afraid that if God doesn’t answer, then my faith might fall. I am afraid that if my faith falls, everyone whom I have ever told about Jesus will see that my God isn’t real. Sometimes I am afraid of my own fears. I am afraid that my fears of putting all my eggs in one basket will hold me back from the life that God intends for me to live. I am afraid that I will never be able to fully surrender to God because I am too afraid to fail. If God doesn’t answer my prayers, does that make him any less real? Occasionally I think so, but tonight I don’t. Am I even praying for the right things? If I pray for something, and it doesn’t happen, is that because I wasn’t praying for God’s will to be done? He isn’t a magic genie who grants my every wish. So what is he? He is God. He is Creator. He is Holy. He is Glorious. He is Love. He sacrificed everything because he loves me and everyone around me. He is amazing. He is it. I guess when I think more about who God is and less about who I am, the answers to my prayers don’t seem to matter as much. My faith isn’t based on that anymore. My faith is based on God, on who He is, not on what he can do for me. I can pray boldly when I know God, when my heart is connected with His, because I can be confident in who he is. What is the purpose of prayer anyway? To ask for things? The majority of my prayers think so… But really, it is through prayer that I come to know God. And in knowing God more, I want to know him more.

Revelation Thoughts

I've been reading through the book of Revelation with my best friend and it is absolutely crazy. I feel like I've been stretched more than Stretch Armstrong. I think it is awesome that John wrote down the praises of those around the throne. Their praises say so much about our God.
Amen!
Praise and glory
and wisdom and thanks and honor
and power and strength
be to our God for ever and ever
Amen!
I want to trust and follow a God like that.
There is also a lot of scary stuff in Revelation that I don't understand. However, I am realizing that in order to follow God, we have to follow all of him, not just the parts that pat our backs. We can't just cut and paste from the Bible and take what makes us feel good. If we do that, we have created a fake god, we have committed idolatry.
Confession: There have been times in my life when I have made God into who I want him to be. He became the one who gave me love and joy and peace and strength. He never called me to sacrifice, and there is no hardship and there is no suffering or wrestling. I'm almost done with the New Testament, and I have learned that it is the latter descriptors that are what God has called us to. Don't believe me? Read Luke 14:25-35. The cost is high. If we want to follow Jesus wholeheartedly, we cannot be selective. He is the Lion and the Lamb.
I'll leave you with an awesome passage.
And there before me was a great multitude that no one could count, from every nation, tribe, people and language, standing before the throne and in front of the Lamb. They were wearing white robes and were holding palm branches in their hands. And they cried out in a loud voice: Salvation belongs to our God, who sits on the throne, and to the Lamb....These are they who have come out of the great tribulation; they have washed their robes and made them white in the blood of the Lamb. Therefore, they are before the throne of God and serve him day and night in his temple; and he who sits on the throne will spread his tent over them. Never again will they hunger; never again will they thirst. The sun will not beat down on them, nor any scorching heat. For the Lamb at the center before the throne will be their shepherd; he will lead them to springs of living water. And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes.
Revelation 7:9-10, 14-17